11 Years Ago Today....

I was in the hospital. It was probably about this time that I was getting to see and touch my baby boy for the first time. I went into the hospital on Monday, 9/17/01 and they started to induce me at 4:30 PM. I thought for sure I was going to have my baby boy on Jodi’s birthday! I remember being so excited and scared and nervous and excited and just having so many emotions going through me! They started the pitocin drip to start my labor…and it started very, very slowly. So, they decided to break my water. Boy, that wasn’t pleasant. Then my labor got harder….but every time I had a contraction, Isaac’s heartbeat would go down substantially. I remember getting the epidural and finally having some relief from the contractions and eventually sleeping! Isn’t that funny! So…after a long night of this….and no baby on Jodi’s birthday…..they came in and woke me up (again, funny because I was in labor!) to tell me that they were going to take the baby via c-section. I remember my mother-in-law crying and I was just thinking – do whatever you have to do – just get this kid out of me! I was actually very calm because my mom had two c-sections, so I was pretty prepared for that route for some reason. In fact, I never thought I would actually push a baby out of me….but maybe that was because I had watched Janice do that and I wanted no part of it. HA! So, they prepped me and Scott (lol) for my c-section and took me into the operating room. It was no time at all and they had our baby boy out! Our baby boy. I can’t even describe the emotions that overwhelmed me at that moment. They showed him to me… well, us because Scott did not watch much of the c-section! I remember them taking him over to the “baby area” and not hearing a lot of noise like I thought I would hear. Isaac wasn’t really crying, but more like grunting. We didn’t know what to expect, but we could tell that something wasn’t right. Soon after, they took Isaac out of the room and I was having these waves of nausea and convulsions. I remember them taking me out of the OR and to the recovery area and just laying there wondering what was going on. I was shaking uncontrollably and scared to death. Scott went to see what was going on with Isaac and I remember Mom and Dad and Scott’s parents coming to see me and tell me how pretty he was. They had whisked him off to the nursery to take care of him. There wasn’t anything really ‘wrong’ with him, but the grunting was concerning to him. They wanted to hear some good old big cries! He finally did! My first glimpses of Isaac were on video and cameras because I was still in recovery and he was in the nursery. They finally moved me to a room and got me all settled in. I will never forget the longing that I had to hold my baby! In all the tv shows and movies you see the mom hold the baby right away and all that jazz…I was dying not being able to hold him! I wanted to try to nurse him (kinda) and I wanted to hold him and look at his 10 fingers and 10 toes and just swallow him up! FINALLY a very nice nurse brought him into the room. They had to feed him already (so I didn’t get to feed him first) and they had him all cleaned up. This nurse was so nice….and older. My husband can talk to the wall….he struck up a conversation with her because we were pretty sure she was a nurse there when he was born (um…who cares…give me my kid) and so she proceeds to talk about that and all that stuff while swaddling Isaac to get him out of the bassinet to give him to me. I am aching to see/hold/touch my baby. About the time she prepares to hand him to me for the first time….he pooped or something. So, she went through this painful process of unwrapping him…changing him….cleaning him…talking…taking forever! Then she started the whole swaddling thing all over again. I know that at least 3 hours has passed (okay, 5 minutes) when my mom finally spoke up….”She hasn’t even been able to touch him once yet. Can you just let her hold him?” The nurse was like, oh of course! And FINALLY handed me my baby boy. My Isaac Wayne. My bundle of joy. Ahhh….awesome! God is so good. Isaac. That name is so appropriate for the little man that we have in our lives. It means “he who brings laughter” and boy, oh boy, does he ever bring joy and laughter to all who know him. I love that kid so much. He has blessed our lives beyond measure. I thank God every day for the joy that is Isaac and for allowing me the opportunity to raise this young man. I pray that he will continue to bring joy to those he touches and also show Christ’s love in all that He does. I know that he makes mistakes and I know that he will make lots and lots more mistakes…but he is a child of God and God has big plans for this little man of mine! Early on…my dad started the nickname of Angelman for Isaac. And he is just that. He is my Angel! So, Happy Birthday Angelman! I love you more today than I did yesterday and I will love you more tomorrow than I do today. You have brought me so much joy and so much happiness. I cannot imagine our lives without you in it!